Don't Feel Down: Look for the Silver Lining

These days, it’s easy to feel down. The economy isn’t doing very well, and perhaps family and friends are experiencing hardship. It may seem trivial, but it’s useful to look for the silver lining. Here’s a study I read recently that shows the value of looking on the bright side.

When things aren't going right, it is useful to look on the bright side: Remember that things could be worse. When you get a $100 parking ticket unexpectedly, for example, you might as well think, "At least I didn't get a $200 ticket or get towed." It works to think positively. A study by Dr. Chris Davis, a professor of psychology at Carleton University, and his colleagues illustrates the usefulness of looking on the bright side. Participants were asked to imagine they had just experienced a major setback. Some of the participants were instructed to look on the bright side in that they were asked to consider the fact that matters could have been a lot worse. Other participants were asked to consider how the situation could have been much better. The mood of the participants was measured and compared. Research findings clearly favored looking on the bright side of things. People who focused on how matters could have turned out much worse felt happier after a major setback than people who focused on how events could have been more favorable. So if you want to be happy after you encounter a setback, look on the bright side.

How you look at a setback strongly influences how you recover from it. If you view a setback as a dreaded event, and imbue it with strong personal significance, you'll feel so emotionally overwhelmed that you will be tempted to engage in avoidance and denial. Rather than taking decisive action, you will waste precious psychological resources denying the reality of the situation. It's better to take setbacks in stride, find solutions, and move forward. Don't mull over what went wrong. Instead, figure out what you can do next to improve to solve problems. Many people spend all their time coping with emotions. They may deny the trouble they are in, for example. This is a passive approach that is rarely effective. Research demonstrates that it’s much better to take an active, problem solving approach. Whenever you feel beaten down, it’s more useful to distract yourself from thinking negatively and focus on what you can do to change the situation in which you find yourself. You may want to get more information, or develop a specific plan of action. But whatever you do, don’t get stuck. Don’t mull over the possibilities too much and start thinking, "Why did things turn out so wrong?" It's vital that you stay focused on taking active steps to solve problems. Think like a scientist. Pretend you are merely solving a mundane problem, like finding the solution to a basic math problem. Figure out what you can do next. Don't question your abilities. Self-doubt is a complete waste of time and energy. Look on the bright side for a moment, optimistically search for ways to pick yourself up off the ground, and take decisive action.